finger licking nasty

Imagine, if you will, a teacher passing out a worksheet to her eager students. Her fingers are dry, she can't get the papers in the stack to separate. What to do? Yes, shesticks out her tongue and licks her finger, then parses out stacks of papers, enough for each row. Each row has its own "finger-lick". Which is nasty beyond discussion.

Yes, I confess, I did that up until a few years ago. When it occured to me how nasty that action is. And I enlisted my student's aide- every time I licked my finger in preparation to pass out papers, the kids were to say, quite vocally I insisted, "EWWWWWWW!"

It did not take me long to break myself of that habit.

Fast forward to this week, I'm sitting in a classroom as a student, increasing in depth my understanding of electricity...electric pressure... color coding pressure changes throughout series and parallel circuits.. feeling like the class had some pretty good moments... laughing with my co-workers.. getting some good ideas.
But...
Every time that professor went to pass out papers... EWWWWWWW!!!... she had to lick her finger to get the papers going... at first I didn't notice, I sat in the back. Then she rearranged us and then I sat in the front of a row... fuck.

It was like listening to talented singer sing your favorite song...with spinach in her teeth...

Momma's don't LEt your Babies grow up to be eggheads

See that little sign on the right? The one about asplosions without awarnings.

Well, here's your warning.
Parents (and those of you that one day will be) please listen:

You are not doing your child any favors if you solve all his problems for him. I understand a helping hand, I do. You have experiences your child will definitely benefit from. But, if after 3 years your Darling Buddy still doesn't have enough credits to be called a freshman (that's 4 passing grades, BTW out of 24, for this kid), then you are not doing him any favors to get him extra chances to complete his work by asking the principal to put the kid in ISS (in school suspension) to complete all his work that he didn't do the 1ST 3 CRAPPING TIMES HIS TEACHER GAVE HIM THE CHANCE TO DO IT. Because, after three years he will suddenly decide to do all his work. Correctly. For me to grade. In one week. Because I have nothing else to do. And then the princ. says we should give it to him so we could tell the the mother we did everything we could for her child. Because holding him responsible for his own gottdamn actions has somehow been deemed not fucking good enough.


And in ten years the parent will still be supporting his sorry good-for-nothing-ass cause he won't keep a job, and just like Pavlov's dogs she's trained him to be a loser and he knows she'll keep taking care of him. And she'll blame every one but herself.
She needs to step back and say, "this is now your responsibility. When you begin to pass all of your classes, you may have TV, radio, Pillowcases, meat, music, soda, games, friends, heating and air conditioning, a door for his room, a computer, candy, hunting (fill in whatever he really likes here ), and a social life. If you are not progressing in you education when you are 18 then you will move out of my house and support yourself.
One of two things would happen. He would,

A. Begin to do his work and pass his classes, thereby having the good things that go along with responsible behavior,
or
B. He would drop out of school and get kicked out of his house.

But it would be his choice, his actions, his responsibility.

This is the type of crap that will make me quit teaching. When we stop holding kids accountable. Do you think it's like this everywhere?

So, every year, my students take a big test, mandated by our state. This test counts for 15% of their overall grade. We are very careful to cover everything on the test plus whatever else we manage to fit in. Then the next year we get to look at our data and see what's what. Compare our classes to others in the same school, county, and state. If too many fail, it's our heads.

State wise- 40% of the students passed the test. For me, it was an average of 70% passing. That's right. Almost double. My lowest class- 53%, my highest-80%. And I don't teach honors. Last year after results came in, I went student by student and checked their scores- compared that data to the student's grade in my class and attendance record. You can imagine the results.
The students that

• showed up most,
• who turned in their work, a
• nd passed the tests are the one who passed.
• Almost to a one, the students with poor work and attendance ethics are the ones who failed the test.

So now what do I have to do?
Yes, figure out where I failed. What I can do to make sure more of my students pass. Zeebus wept!

Now, why do I teach? I love science. I want to share my love of science. Simple.
I want my students to love science as much as I do. But, I'm realistic. And I'll settle for passing. I'll even bust my butt to show you an idea 10 different ways just so's you get it. But if a student won't even be bothered to participate, I've got 4 words.
See.You.Next. Year.
You sure will fail.
You will not graduate.
Stay Awake Next Time

I quit

I told my department head that since our county office/administrator's were going to keep changing the rules and not tell me, and the order that we're doing stuff, and expect all this other shit outta me, then I have had enough. Add that to the yottaPMS (that PMS with 24 zeros added to the end, I'll have you know) AND YOU HAVE A RECIPE FOR DISASTER. I'm drinking Mohito's and if I'm not at work tomorrow it will be because I am still drunk. Sue me and give me a PDP and see if I care! We're having cheesy ravioli's, garlic bread, and chocolate for dinner. In front of the TV, watching chick flicks. No men for miles. And trust me, that's a good thing tonight.

I'm off to kick my (male) dog.

CYA

I think I might vomit

Wanna go?
You will discover extraordinary teachings about sensuality, science and consciousness in a multicultural and festive environment.

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Want to adopt a clitoris?

These are perfect examples of what happens when you are bat shit crazy AND rich.

Where my heads explodes

So I was having a discussion with a very good friend of mine, filling her in on the extremely boring events of my life.

Wait, go get a beer, this is gonna be a long one.
.
.
.
.

So, where was I? Oh, yes. My friend. I was relaying a conversation that I'd had where I asked the following question:

"So what do you think About Pope Benedict saying the Catholic Church is the One True Church?"

I keep forgetting that I live 10 miles from hell, and it's filled with Baptists. Who think the Pope is the Devil Right Hand Man. Who think women should be subservient to men. And cannot have an intelligent conversation with it being I'm right/ you're wrong in 5 seconds flat.

Wait, my head is spinning around on my neck, and the word BULLSHIT keeps popping in my head like it's the 4th of July!

Oosa, Oosa. OK, I'm good.
It was interesting, especially when she said the Catholics were wrong for worshipping Mary. Whoa, I like Mary. She gets the beautiful blue dress, and my grandmother prayed to her. Don't mess with Mary. It was also kinda neat to see her lips disappear in a frown when I told her I thought that when we died, that was just it. And that Jesus was probably a real guy with great ideas at the right time, much like Martin Luther King.

So back to my true friend. She said I should have invited some of my pagan friends to the discussion. See, I used to belong to this group that got together a couple of times of year. Rest, recharge, eat great food, great tea. But then things got a little touchy, some people got a little crazy. Hell, some were just plain bat shit. One of the women suggested that there was a new race of humans who had DNA that no one had ever seen before and that it was different from every one else's. Aaaand, the Government was trying to cover it up.
For shizzle.
So, sayeth I, don't you think that if your government really wanted that covered up it would be? And if it wasn't and it was true, don't you think that every major, hospital, drug company, university, and tabloid would have their hands in it? We'd hear about it 24/7 for about 2 weeks. And where's the FUCKING SCIENCE?

So I'm relaying that conversation to my bright friend. Now, this woman has 2 college degrees, served in the Gulf War as a medic, worked the crash sites for several major airplane crashes, worked as a hematologist. And she can figure out how to make shit work, even if she has to create a part for it. Much like Og (whom I hold in very high respects, BTW).
Just so you know, the chick is smart!!!

and what, pray tell does she say about the new "species"?
Oh, you mean the Indigo Children.

FUUCK, there goes my head again.


So I Google Indigo Children and find

This
and
This

Basically, children who are high strung, a bit antisocial, prone to misbehaving, but since they are being raised by "New Age Parents" they are being touted as special, telekinetic, sensitive, mind readers, the new humans?
But I have a question
WHERE IN THE MOTHERFUCKING HELL IS THE SCIENCE?????

Educators say, this is crap, scientists would also like to see their science.


There are so many thing to say about this- but first go read the articles.
-ADHD is more prevalent. I don't know why, probably environmental, not genetic. Asberger's is very hard on the small child, but can lead to very fulfilling, highly organized and rewarding lives. But which would you rather hear, if you were raised in this instant gratification world, that your kid had a disorder or your kid is special and is here to save the world?
-I say Verily, Science (the search for knowledge) is about provable events, ideas, relationships. Without proof, I could say the Moon is made of Cheese, that I had made a Cold Fission machine, Aids is not rampant in African countries (what was that king's name?), our universe is geocentric, and, if Rael is to be believed, we can clone humans to reach perfection and then go back to the sky with the other extraterrestrials. (make sure to watch the video and send your donation to reserve your space on the ship.)

Holy hopping sheep shit, people. What has happened to the human race that we cannot think for
ourselves but will blindly believe the absurdity that shysters fling at us?