9 years

It's been 9 years since my mother died. Strange. It's just been in the last few years that I have felt that loss. Physically, I mean. I miss drinking a beer with my mother. I miss her telling me to not believe everything I hear and only half of what I see. I miss how much my daughter loved her. I miss having someone who believed in me. I miss my mother. I miss the understanding that the book is ALWAYS better than the movie. I miss my mother. I am guilty of not loving her the what she deserved. I am guilty of being mad at her for not being perfect. I am guilty of being mad at her for giving up after my father died. Of not being strong.
I love my mother. And I miss her.