Cukes
I'm teaching biology this year, I'm sure I've mentioned. We're starting on cell reproduction, and sexual vs. asexual reproduction. The following conversation took place, with my {{thoughts}} added:
Me (to the class): So, what do you think might be the biggest difference between sexual and asexual reproduction?
Student 1 (male): One has sex, while the other doesn't.
Me: {{that didn't take long}}, well, yes, but on a more basic level, one needs sex cells, while the other doesn't. Asexual means that there is one parent making identical offspring by blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Me: Sexual Reproduction requires egg and sperm to be in the same place at the same time. Some animals mate, while others don't. Frogs and fish don't have sex.
Student 2 (female): What?! That's crazy!
Me: Most animals only have sex to reproduce. Only a few have sex for other reasons
Male #2: Dolphins!!
Me: Right. Chimpanzees trades sex for power and protection. We've seen that before {{waits for it}}
Female 2: My mother has this cucumber patch...
Me: {{Shit, not a story about cucumbers and sex, what have they heard about that, please don't go down that road, please, please please!!! And for Gott's Sake, DON"T START LAUGHING!!!}}
Female 2: yeah, we had to rub the male flowers on the female flowers to make cucumbers.
Me:
Class:
Me: {{ That wasn't what I expected... DONT LAUGH. Get the mental image of the cucumber porn out of your head!}}
Me: Right, that's one way to do it. Let's move on.
3 comments:
Funny stuff !
Thanks for the transcript.
No, no, I will not believe you did not laugh. That is just not physically possible not to laugh.
God, I could never be a teacher, ESPECIALLY one teaching sex. Ummm, well you know what I mean.
Hah hah hah very funny.
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